There seems to be a whole lot of talk around at the moment about the need to be ‘more real’ on social media. Have you seen it, or been a part of it? Do you agree?
I really don’t, and to be honest I find it a bit irritating. I’ll tell you why.
My life is just like everyone else’s life. It has super fun awesome stuff in it, and it has piles of laundry, arguments about beer bottle tops left in the sink and kids who won’t put their fucking shoes away and then spend 45 minutes the next day trying to find the right one, which might be downstairs but could otherwise be in the car or up the chimney.
I love the whole chaotic mess. It’s great, it really is. (Except for the beer bottle tops. I mean, the bin is literally right there under the sink FFS.)
But I don’t really fancy spending time unnecessarily dwelling on the stuff that makes my blood boil. Why would I? What would that bring me?
I tend to use social media as a way to be grateful for what is good in my life and celebrate what is going right. It’s like an extension of a gratitude journal.
It’s exactly the same as if I run into you in the street. If you ask me how I’m going, I’m not going to tell you that my IBS is playing up and that the air conditioning in the car is broken. I’ll tell you I’m great, and that we’re planning our winter holidays to the beach, and that I just had a rad night out with my gal pal Gillian.
Why? Because that’s all great stuff that is fun to talk about. And I like fun.
And, frankly, if you want to tell me about all the things that suck in your world every time we meet, I’m probably going to be super busy next time you call.
Being miserable and wallowing in what we don’t have is just not my vibe. So I’m going to show you pictures of the fun play I went to last week, or a delicious cup of tea that rocked my world, or that happy moment with my daughter after we’d been for a run together. I’m grateful for all of those things, and they all make me happy.
And then we get to sharers of Kardashian proportions, and all the envy that goes along with that. There are some that will moan about how much those shoes/houses/husbands cost, or what a waste it all is. But who cares? If you like it, follow it. If you don’t, click away or go read a book.
There seems to be this bizarre sense of entitlement that goes along with social media these days. This bitterness that just because we don’t have something, the person who does is showing off or is clearly a bitch. I guess that precedes social media though, doesn’t it, it’s just all so immediate now.
But it’s like some people love reveling in the deprivation of not having all the things. Their comments will often point out just how much these things cost and how that’s far beyond the reach of a normal person. And their comments are so often followed by that most passive-aggressive of hashtags: #justsaying
Sure you are. Nobody in the history of saying, has ever been ‘just saying’ anything when they said ‘#justsaying’.
We’ve always bought magazines full of pretty things we’ll never own and that’s always pretty much been okay. Look at Belle Magazine for instance. Beautiful interiors and all sorts of design marvellousness. I love to look at all that stuff, but I don’t feel ripped off that it’s not in my house. Because I’m not four years old.
I like to thing of social media like one great bit crowd-sourced magazine.
And it’s wonderful and inspiring and fun, and I love it.
What it’s important to remember is that our social media accounts are not meant to be a literal blow-by-blow account of our lives. They are – as we are often reminded – a highlight reel.
I love sharing highlights, and I love sharing funny, pretty or inspiring things from other people. Because, to me, that’s the positive side of reality. And that’s the side I always prefer to sit on. How about you?