Life’s too short for these things

Life’s too short. We hear it all the time, don’t we? And we say it a whole lot too. So I decided to make a list of shit I reckon life’s too short for.

And then I’d ask you what you thought on our Facebook page. The response was coco-bananas overwhelming – so I chose some of my favourites to share below as well.


Life’s too short for…

Talking about how terrible the world is

The world will always have awful things going on, but it will also always have amazing things going on. Why not focus on its beauty instead? Where you place your attention is what you see.

Bad coffee

I am currently trying to heal some dodgy gut issues (where you from, you sexy thing?) so am off lactose and caffeine. I tried drinking decaf lactose-free flat whites – but would make my husband order them because EMBARRASSING – but then I saw the meme below and now I just drink herbal tea instead. Fucking hell.

Life's too short for bad coffee

Talking about how busy you are

Yes, I’m busy. You’re busy. It happens. If we’re so busy, let’s not give another moment to dwelling on how busy we are and instead talk about which chocolate we’re going to eat or what type of massage we’d like to get.


Except for what I did to my brows in the early 90s. Time can never make that okay.

Life's too short for denim vests

Giving a shit what other people think of your parenting

Sometimes I get my kids out of the car on the road side, sometimes I give my kids eggs on toast for dinner, sometimes I let me daughter cry for a few minutes when she’s in bed and wants her twelfth cuddle before she goes to sleep because holy shit she really can be a drama queen sometimes. Call Social Services if you must, I’m pouring a glass of red and watching House of Cards with the volume turned way up.

Spending time with people who care how clean your floor is

Unless they have some sort of disorder that makes them want to lick the floor. Same goes for people who apologise ad nauseum for the ‘absolute state’ of their house when it looks like it’s sprung straight from the pages of Anally Tidy Homes Monthly. Yawn.



And now here are some of my favourites from your list:


Serena: Saving stuff for good! Light that smelly candle, crack open that vintage wine, douse yourself in your fancy perfume, use that massage gift voucher and wear that fabulous frock. Denying yourself and saving stuff till a special occasion doesn’t make sense. Today is worth celebrating!

Gabrielle: Constantly denying yourself the things you love ….. Whatever it is . Bacon , whiskey , shoes , chocolate , good sex ! Whatever .


Leesa: Self doubt – go for it, the worst thing is not failure – the worst thing is being your own handbrake.

Emma: Finishing a book you don’t like. Ditch it & move on (also applies to relationships, obligation friendships, etc).

Beth: Bad books, nasty wine and cheap chocolate.

Screen Shot 2016-06-22 at 4.54.22 PM
Image credit:

Reggie: Worrying about things that may not happen

Beth: Eating margarine and or salt reduced butter/ANYTHING
Stacey: ‘Safely’ removing a USB.

Do you agree with these? What do you say life’s too short for?

Written By

Carolyn is the editorial director of Champagne Cartel and a freelance writer. In her spare time she is a long-distance runner, peanut butter enthusiast, and single mum to three incredible humans.


Leave a Reply