How to move on when life isn’t fair

As much as I try to look on the bright side of life, I can’t help but feel that certain aspects of my life have been really unfair in the past 12 months. Work and finances have been a constant stress, clients haven’t paid me and friends have let me down in my times of need. All of which I felt like I have had no control over.

I found myself swearing and complaining at the universe that all of it wasn’t fair. That I was a good person who didn’t deserve the barrage of shit being sent in my direction. That it can stop with all the negative things now because I’d had my fair share of crap and it was again time for me to prosper, because that’s how life should be – a balance between good and bad. You do a good thing and you should rewarded for it, right?!

Well, apparently not.

That’s not really how life is at all. Life isn’t fucking fair. For anyone. Innocent people are murdered, beautiful souls develop degenerative diseases, mean people become billionaires and sleaze balls pick up sweethearts. And most of the time, there isn’t a single thing we can do about it.

(At this point in the article, I feel a sudden desire to shout out to all the Emo’s out there. Keep on keeping on you guys!)

Before anyone goes slitting their wrists, it’s good time to point out that despite life not being fair, we can all still live happy lives. Just because one area of our life might not be going to plan, it doesn’t mean that other parts aren’t. We can also choose not to get bitter about it the unfair bits, and we can choose to accept that is just the way life is.

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When we accept that life isn’t always fair, we instantly feel a sense of relief and that a weight has been lifted off our shoulders. The sooner we do that, the sooner we can move on in our lives and start enjoying them again. That’s what happened for me anyway.

I would like to tell you that I got to the point of accepting that life isn’t fair by applying my inner wisdom early in the piece, and that all of my years of being a yogi and shamanic student had paid off. I didn’t though. I went through months of suffering and questioning my faith in everything before reaching that point. Hopefully by reading this article, you won’t have to endure the same.

When we let go of whether things should be fair or not, we get back into the flow of life. We open ourselves up to new possibilities and give ourselves the chance to receive some positive gifts (even if it’s not in the area we feel hard done by in). And who knows – the ‘bad’ things that have happened may have actually created the way for bigger and better things. You could find yourself being grateful for the hard times in retrospect!

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I feel it imperative to also mention that the acceptance of bad luck and hardship does not preclude the existence of karma. In my opinion, karma very much exists. Every action has a consequence. So, even though we may not have consciously created our hardship, how we react to it can create future karma. Therefore, by not reacting negatively, we are creating a better future for ourselves.

There are always some good things in our lives, irrespective of how much bad. During my shit year, I’ve been able to spend more time walking my dogs, hanging out with my family and relaxing in nature. Those are actually the things I long for when everything else is going to plan. Funny that! If I’d realised that from the beginning, I probably could have actually enjoyed the past 12 months.

So, the second you start feeling hard done by, remember that you have a choice. You can choose to get down about it and wait until justice is served (which may never happen), or you can accept that that is just the way it is. Life can be a turd sometimes but that doesn’t mean our entire lives have to be.

Have you had unbelievably bad luck lately? What did you do to get through it?

Written By

Mahdi is an advocate for nature, animals and people. She has poor fashion sense but a good sense of humour. She hopes that one day there will be ample female toilets in all venues. She is the author of ‘The Power of You: How to Positively Influence People, Places and the World’ and founder of Mahdi Earth and The Earth Healers’ Hub.

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