by Carolyn Tate
I have three kids whom I love very much. They are a gaggle of challenging, delightful, incredible and engaging wee creatures, ranging in age from 9 down to 1.
As my 40th birthday looms like that great big marshmallow monster in Ghostbusters (above), my body is going into closing down sale mode – all eggs must go!
Champagne Gillian has a name for this. She calls it our ‘Lizard Brain’. She theorises that we go all primal and reproducey because that’s what we’re built for and TIME IS RUNNING OUT!
Every time I see a fresh baby I just want to sniff it and take it and hide in a cave somewhere to snuggle. But after being pregnant or looking after small children for the past 10 years, my inner Sensible Woman side knows it’s time to move on. There are so many other things I want to do, and I want to be able to focus on the three children I already have.
But our lizard brains don’t give a shit that we want to have a fabulous career. Our lizard brains don’t care that we need some effing sleep. Our lizard brains couldn’t give a toss that we really want to have a quiet moment to drink a margarita by a pool somewhere.
No. Our lizard brains want us to reproduce because that’s what these bodies are built for. And our windows are closing ANY MINUTE NOW. I really don’t want any more kids. The ones I have are enough work; enough love; enough fun; enough chaos; enough expense. And if I have another child, I will have to buy a Torago. No.
But will someone please tell my Lizard Brain?
Do you feel driven to reproduce even though you know it’s a terrible idea?
I’ll toast that. I also love that you can’t spell Tarago – cause that would just be giving into to the whole shebang wouldn’t it?
Yes! That’s how much I DON’T want to be part of that world. 😉
I’ll toast to that! I also love that you can’t spell Tarago – cause that would just be giving into to the whole shebang wouldn’t it?
Hilarious! and frighteningly true. As we’ve discussed, my lizard is a gargantuan beast of a thing. Here I am with a four month old baby (admittedly a good sleeper), SERIOUSLY considering that the idea of getting pregnant again would be awesome. At 42. Oh YAR, good idea!!! Husband has openly said he’d divorce me. We’d be SO OLD by the time we get sleep again. Bad lizard, get back in your terrarium.